Shaping Your Coaching Presence

By Mark Teahan – Director of Education for the Spencer Institute

Coaches are always looking to define their work. For some, it is an art form where we work to create an environment with each client, where conversations become seminal and a way of being for our client to aspire to.  We get excited about the many ways to engage a client in the processes we can deploy to move each of them toward their unique, desired goals in a manner that not only transforms them but endures.  The key is a single ingredient that is not learned; it is ingrained in every coach. It is the caring of the human being before us that matters most.  It’s not just the external results that inform our relationships.  It’s more internal – and for our client, it is the most significant and foremost.

What is Coaching Presence?

Coaching supports client growth and transformation.  We all get that. But it’s not just the conversations that coaches master to encourage transformation or change.  It is how we are being with people (remember those Being Skills).  We are genuinely concerned not only with their results but also with the person seeking to reach goals or outcomes. Our strategies and the actual client are not mutually exclusive.  They are considered one. Coaching presence can be seen as a way of being with clients (mindful, empathetic, warm, calm, fun, or even courageous) that promotes growth and change through a human connection. Failing to protect or pursue a thorough coaching presence with clients undermines the impact of every coaching session. If your partnership with a client is not successful, it may have less to do with knowledge, skills, and abilities than with the nature of your coaching presence.

Why is a Coaching Presence Important?

High-functioning coaches also recognize the coaching presence as a core coaching competency based on the ability to be fully aware, conscious, and ready to create spontaneous relationships with your client.  This is done by employing a style that is open and relaxed; it is flexible and balanced with confidence.  In general terms, a professional coach is fully present and flexible during the coaching process and is engaged at the moment. The coach also knows how to access and trust their intuition and their inner knowledge, meaning that their gut feelings weigh heavy on their approach.

A coach working to honor the coaching presence is always open to not knowing everything and is willing to take some reasonable risks with their strategies.  This can include envisioning many ways to work with the client and the confidence to choose what is most effective.

But the coaching presence goes deeper than this, including the proper use of humor to create a less-heavy feeling or seriousness, while displaying a balanced energy level in session. Confidence is key. The coach shows that they have the confidence to shift perspectives on the fly and experiment with new possibilities for action – but only when the client is ready.  Emotional regulation is always controlled, meaning that the coach is never brought into the clients’ emotional world.

Constructing a Coaching Framework

This is just part of the reason it becomes vital for coaches to construct some framework or philosophical principles when working with clients.

Coaches determine if a client’s change effort or challenge is solvable or it’s not; they see any risk is always reducible using a better way of acting or behaving.  They acknowledge success as a byproduct of working toward change and allow emotions to teach us. Coaches also tap into higher intelligence and believe all client answers can be found somewhere. Maybe most important is the belief that self-confidence can be orchestrated or constructed. Qualified coaches believe that problems are immediate opportunities and every client is assumed to be doing their best, even when it seems otherwise.

Frameworks on which coaches lean upon will also work to empower clients in movement, growth, and connection. They anchor what is described as the “quality of presence” that leads to fostering and enhancing growth.  This is the foundation of all successful coach/client relationships. Clients learn and grow not only because of what coaches do but also because of how coaches are being.

Skills Used in Coaching

Coaching presence is developed through the practice of using client-centered relational qualities, called “Being Skills” in many of our programs (we also explore “doing skills” in contrast). By definition, Being Skills are the skills coaches use to establish relationships that promote growth; as the name implies, this is seen as how a coach is “being” in session.  It is a manifestation of the coach being their most genuine or authentic.

When coaches lack some of the Doing Skills required to serve clients, it is okay; they can acquire them over time. To begin, the coach should work to develop a strong coaching presence grounded in Being Skills by staying calm and having a balance of confidence and energy that projects outwardly. One interesting aspect of this approach is that when modeling these Being Skills, the coach shows their trust in the client’s ability to transform or succeed with a change effort.  This is when the coach can be assured that they are doing things right – they can shift from mere competence to coaching mastery. This energy of mastery is contagious, and clients derive both self-efficacy and confidence to move forward successfully with their vision and goals.

Indeed, we refer to these “being” qualities as skills because they are qualities that can be chosen, valued, and strengthened in pursuit of a coach’s professional development.  Coaches start with getting certified at a foundational level; only when they feel confident to push through to a higher level should they seek more intensive levels of coach training that elevates not just these skills, but their dialogues and strategies, too. It all starts with the client and their needs – but where things go from there is up to the discretion of the coach and their available tools. The higher levels of training are where we see a distinction between a coach and a master coach. If you are a coach looking to get better client results and more satisfying work, stay educated and on top of the art form we call coaching!