“Self-care” seems to be one of those terms that’s getting thrown around a ton in recent years. “What do you do for self-care?” or “Ugh, you need some self-care…” or even “What the heck is self-care?!” may all be common statements.
In the health and wellness industry, we hear about, discuss, and recommend “self-care” all too often. But does anyone really know what self-care means? I’m going to be bold and say the majority of “professionals” have been getting it wrong. Hear me out…
Self-care is not about getting massages once a week, going to therapy, seeing a coach, or getting your hair done. Self-care is not something that always has to cost money or time. Self-care is not something that was created equal for everyone… nor something that everyone needs in the same capacity.
Am I confusing you yet? Good. I want to tell you what I consider to be the truth about self-care.
True, authentic, life-changing, health-promoting, happiness-creating self-care is completely based on YOU! It is based on who you are as an individual. And only when you can design your “self-care” regimen to be based solely on you as the unique (and maybe quirky) individual you are, will you ever understand what the term truly means, and how to benefit from it.
This is where things sound simple, but are actually extremely complicated for most people, or at least most Americans. We have become inundated with “shoulds” – the media tells us constantly what we “should” like, what “should” make us happy, and what the quickest path to health “should” be. Well unfortunately, I’m pretty sure what makes me happy and healthy is not always the same thing as another young woman in California, let alone an 87-year-old Nebraskan man. The challenge is getting to know ourselves well enough to be able to discern what IS good for us- and then honor that.
Only I can know what truly makes me happy, what really makes my heart sing. My doctor or primary health provider can help me figure out what areas to focus on with my health if there are some concerns, but only I can figure out what avenues I will really commit to and how much diet and exercise I will incorporate into my life. Now here’s the secret: if you can figure out the paths that are right for you… NONE of it will seem like work. It will be a joy to take care of yourself on all levels: physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
So here’s the million-dollar question: What makes YOU happy?
I mean truly, genuinely, super authentically happy… The type of happy that makes you smile like you can’t stop, warms your heart like there’s a fire inside, and fills your soul to the brim and more… If you don’t know the answer, don’t worry- you aren’t alone. Many of us are walking through life on autopilot doing activities we think are “supposed” to make us happy or fulfill us- but how often do we reflect on if they really do? Not everyone will want to do yoga three times a week or meditate with the trees. Some of us may want blare our favorite country song in our super-awesome Honda when we leave work, as a way to decompress and relax. See what I mean?
Self-care is more about YOU knowing how to take care of YOU than any specific modality or activity. When you can tap into YOURSELF – your body, your mind, and your spirit – and can listen to what you are really craving, then you will be able to create a self-care regimen that is not only appealing, but ultimately life-changing. Your path to true, authentic health and happiness will unfold like you’ve never imagined. Enjoy…! J
Jen Julius, MA is a Life Coach, Speaker, Workshop Leader, and Radio Host. With an extensive professional background working with students, families, and incarcerated youth and adults, plus a personal background of battling an eating disorder, addiction, and unhealthy relationships, Jen believes that everyone has a story, but we also have a choice in how we create our lives today and tomorrow. Fore more info go to:www.jenjulius.com and www.facebook.com/JenJuliusCoaching
